Batman 3 (without the D)

I just heard the best piece of news ever concerning the final movie in Christopher Nolan’s Batman trilogy. It’s not that a certain villain will be in it. It’s not that a particular actor has been cast. No, it’s something far better than that: The Dark Knight Rises will not be shot in 3D.

I, for one, am sick to death of 3D. I don’t mind it so much in movies like Avatar or Up, where it just adds a little depth to the scenes. But that’s about all it does. It doesn’t further immerse you in the world of the movie. If anything, it takes me out of it with the constant reminder that I’m wearing a stupid pair of plastic glasses. I don’t hate it when it’s done in this way, but it’s hardly worth paying an extra $4 for a little unnecessary depth and bad fashion.

More than movies that are converted to 3D in post, what I really don’t like are movies that are shot specifically for the gimmick of 3D. I saw Resident Evil: Afterlife in 3D and it was terrible! I at least enjoyed the other Resident Evil movies, but with Afterlife you could pick out exactly which scenes were conceived and shot with 3D in mind. It was just distracting. I don’t need axes and bullets coming straight at me to enjoy a movie (although if I’m going to be honest, I certainly didn’t mind Ali Larter’s breasts coming at me in 3D.) Sure, you get to throw 3D after the title of the movie, but the problem is that once its theatrical run is over, it goes to DVD & cable. And all those shots that looked so cool in 3D on the big screen just look bad when you’re watching them in 2D on your TV. Seeing as that’s where the majority of people are going to watch any given movie, it just makes for bad cinematography.

3D as a gimmick is nothing new. There were a number of 3D movies that came out in the 80s with those red & blue paper glasses, but it was just a gimmick; it went away. I’m not saying today’s 3D isn’t an improvement over the old, because it is. But I still only see it being truly effective when the movie uses 3D for what it is: A gimmick. At least with something like Piranha 3D or Jackass 3D, you know what you’re in for.

Maybe I’m just old school (or stubborn & crotchedy), but I like my movies in two dimensions. I don’t want 3D encroaching on movies that can get by just fine without it. And with ticket prices higher than ever, if I’m going to pay a few extra bucks for a ticket it’ll be to see it in IMAX, not 3D.

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